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A West Side Story

Operator: West Valley Police Dispatch. How can I help you?
Me: Yeah... I found a suspicious package on my driveway this morning. It's a clear bag full of money and some sort of mixture that looks like sand and salt.
Operator: Can you tell what it is?
Me: No, but I thought it might be drugs so I called. I can clearly see a $100 bill.
Operator: Ok. I'll send some officers out there soon.
Me: Should I move the bag away - in case the person comes back for it?
Operator: No, don't touch it till they get there and see what it is.

So I patiently wait and because I'm certain that the person who dropped this will be back, I wait outside and stand right over the package. Ten minutes later a cop car pulls up.

Officer 1: Hello Miss. So, you have a suspicious package huh?
Me: Yes, it's right here. I'm not sure what it is, but I haven't touched it.
Officer 2: You found it this morning?
Me: Yes, as I was taking the garbage out. I checked with my roommates and it doesn't belong to them.
Officer 1: Okay, let's take a look at this. Uh, Miss... this is a fake bill.
Me: What?!
Officer 1: Yeah, it's fake. Let's open it up.
Me: Do you want me to go get some gloves?
Officer 1: [chuckling] No, that won't be necessary. Well you did find something... this is an advertisement.
Me: What?! An advertisement!
Officer 1: And the drugs... that's actually sand. It's an easy way to advertise. Fill the bag and toss it.
Me: [laughing pretty hard at this point].... I thought I stopped a drug drop
Officer 1: Nope, but it appears the advertiser caught your attention.

At this point my neighbor comes around the corner to see what's going on.

Officer 1: Hello Ma'am. Did you get your $100 this morning.
Brooke: Yeah, I sure did. I already tossed mine.
Me: Not me! I thought it was drugs so I called the police! I even made sure to not touch the package. I must watch too many cop/crime drama's cause I could just see CSI out here tearing up the front yard. I feel really stupid right now... I'm so sorry to waste your time.

Officer 2: Well you've made our morning a lot funnier.

Me: Well, I'm glad I could help.

Officer 1: Well have a great day, cause you've made ours!


This is how my Tuesday morning started. How was yours?

Comments

Cook Family said…
Erin I LOVE YOU!!!!! Thanks for making my day too :)
Beth and Jess said…
Oh my gosh!!!! I love it!!! So funny. You are the best.
David and Julie said…
It does look real in the picture. You are hillarious. David loved the story and was laughing pretty hard at you!
Haley said…
My blog post today is simply a referral to read this posting of yours. You may find yourself with a new onslaught of fans.

I can't contain the giggling.
Charity said…
You are awesome!!! Can't wait to show Dean!
Charity said…
Dean wants to know who the company was?? Gr888 advertising!
Ha ha!!! You are SO funny! Definitely too much CSI! In fact, are you sure this isn't from an episode of CSI? It sounds like a perfect cover up...an advertisment....it even fooled WVC Police! LOVE YOU!
Marti said…
Really that might be the best story I've heard in a long time! HILARIOUS!!! I'm so still giggling thinking about you going CSI on the WVC police!
Matt said…
Erin! So glad to have found your blog through Haley. Welcome to the true WEST SIDE! Try to take it easy on the CSI from now on.
Coach Lee said…
i have no words...that is hilarious
Meg said…
This is such an Erin story! I love it! Thanks for making me laugh!

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